Positive Daily Inspiration - April 28, 2024
Sunday Funnies
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“It is the Spirit itself bearing witness with our spirit that we are children of God, and if children, then heirs, heirs of God and fellow heirs with Christ.”
Romans 8:16-17
One day, three men were hiking and unexpectedly came upon a large raging, violent river. They needed to get to the other side, but had no idea of how to do so. The first man prayed to God, saying, “Please God, give me the strength to cross this river.”
Poof! God gave him big arms and strong legs, and he was able to swim across the river in about two hours, after almost drowning a couple of times.
Seeing this, the second man prayed to God, saying, “Please God, give me the strength and the tools to cross this river.”
Poof! God gave him a rowboat and he was able to row across the river in about an hour, after almost capsizing the boat a couple of times.
The third man had seen how this worked out for the other two, so he also prayed to God saying, “Please God, give me the strength and the tools … and the intelligence … to cross this river.”
And poof! God turned him into a woman. She looked at the map, hiked upstream a couple of hundred yards, then walked across the bridge.
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Curtis & Leroy saw an ad in the Starkville Daily News Newspaper in Starkville, MS. and bought a mule for $100.
The farmer agreed to deliver the mule the next day …
The next morning the farmer drove up and said, “Sorry, fellows, I have some bad news, the mule died last night.”
Curtis & Leroy replied, “Well, then just give us our money back.”
The farmer said, “Can’t do that. I went and spent it already.”
They said, “OK then, just bring us the dead mule.”
The farmer asked, “What in the world ya’ll gonna do with a dead mule?”
Curtis said, “We gonna raffle him off.”
The farmer said, “You can’t raffle off a dead mule!”
Leroy said, “We shore can! Heck, we don’t hafta tell nobody he’s dead!”
A couple of weeks later, the farmer ran into Curtis & Leroy at the Piggly Wiggly grocery store and asked.
“What’d you fellers ever do with that dead mule?”
They said, “We raffled him off like we said we wuz gonna do.”
Leroy said, “Shucks, we sold 500 tickets fer two dollars apiece and made a profit of $998.”
The farmer said, “My Lord, didn’t anyone complain?”
Curtis said, “Well, the feller who won got upset. So, we gave him his two dollars back.”
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POSITIVE DAILY PRAYER:
Today, dear God, I claim my spiritual gifts of love, life, wisdom, and joy.
I walk a godly path. I dare to believe that I am a child of God.
I dare to feel and act like the child of God that I am.
I meet each day free from believe in limitations of the past, free from a belief in negative influences of any kind.
I am filled with a feeling of oneness with God.
In Jesus Christ name … Amen
POSITIVE DAILY AFFIRMATION:
The truth has set me free, I am an heir to Divine inheritance of God’s good
POSITIVE DAILY QUOTE:
“Only the shallow know themselves.”
Oscar Wilde
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